“…And What Else?” Issue #20

“...And What Else?”

Newsletter and Thought Starter

Issue No. 20

Success begins by asking the right questions. So why not a newsletter that asks a powerful question: “…and what else?”

Hope these insights pierce through the clutter and create a moment to reflect on your purpose.

First Thoughts

The $97 Carwash

I pulled up to the dealership to replace a burned out headlamp bulb. I had given up trying after 30 minutes of hand cramps, finger scrapes, and a flurry of curse words.

This will be easier for the dealer technician, I reasoned. And since I am a good customer (purchased four cars at this dealership), I was certain it would be a courtesy repair. While I was prepared to wait for the repair, what I was not prepared for was the charge—$97. A charge the young service rep explained as, “Because of the new owners. They require us to charge for these kinds of things.” “But,” he offered, “you’ll get a car wash.”

Hmmm, I thought. This short-term decision to charge me for a service (one previously completed as a no-cost courtesy) is now not a courtesy, but a transaction. Ok, I get the calculation: 30 minutes of a technician’s time multiplied by their hourly rate. It all adds up.

Yet, it doesn’t. It created a disruption in the relationship I had with this organization. It’s now unbalanced—they “charged” me for the interaction when I expected balance. It has tarnished my relationship with that dealership. Short-term decision vs. long-term impact. A quick win.

Not unlike personal relationships, eh?

Consider this: What behaviors are you choosing that are taking rather than creating value? What are you “charging” those around you for your presence? Are you creating short-term convenience (for you) that creates long-term disruption and pain for others?

We all want to profit from our interactions. Yet, the profit need not be at the detriment to our collective bigger, broader, bolder purpose. Or are you ok asking $97 for a carwash?

Thinking Out Loud

Living and Leading with Kindness, Human to Human

We are kind beings by nature. It just doesn’t always appear that way. In fact, it’s easier to accept the proposition that people are inherently jerks—remember your high school history class and the Hobbesian notion of human nature that sees us as solely self-serving individuals? Hobbes’ quote might sound familiar: “Life is solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.” But, I think the truth is more along the lines of, “A person is kind; people are jerks.” I’m not sure if anyone has said it before, but I’ll claim it now.

The Forty-Two Challenge

Question #17: What is the first step you can take today to accomplish that big goal?

The Challenge: Big, long-term goals require sustained effort. But all effort starts with an initial step—a step that is often easy to delay. How about this: identify the three easiest things you need to do to move toward that daunting goal. Do just those three things and see what progress you’ve made.

Share your reflections on your favorite social channel. #FortyTwoQuestions

“You're an unfinished human being.” Carol Dweck

Let’s keep the work going. Learn more about how our coaching meets you where you are in your unfinished leadership journey.

Worth Reading

In Awe by John O’Leary

There was once a time when we viewed each day not as something to endure but as a marvelous gift to explore and savor. Let’s try to discover that again, say O’Leary. Being in awe of life’s so-called ordinary moments is a gift.

Thought Starter: Awe turns us away from self-absorption; it attunes us to others; it reminds us of our place in the world. What took your breathe away? What has excited your sense of wonder? Makes you wonder, doesn’t it?

Worth Watching

Ted Lasso, The Dart Game

There’s so much to like about the show Ted Lasso. Leadership lessons wrapped in a witty comedy. And no leadership lesson is better represented than in this scene. Be curious, not judgmental.

Thought Starter: It is so easy to draw assumptions about people and situations. Yet it takes time to be curious; to ask a question rather than rush to judgment. But it’s time well spent. So, what are your go-to curious questions? “Tell me more,” and “What am I missing?” are my favorites.

Final Thoughts

“Leadership brilliance is expressed more in ‘we together’ cooperation than an ‘I alone’ delusion.”

Edgar Schein and Peter A. Schein, Humble Leadership

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